Letters in issue 8

Homeschooling waves
‘Home Schooling — is it the wave of the future?’ (Sept 03). I really believe it is, from what I’ve learned over the past year. The internet has simply changed all the rules when it comes to educating our children (and ourselves!). Probably ten years from now, putting our children into a classroom-based school system will be merely one of several equally viable options and not the most appealing of those options either.

I expect there will be resistance from those with a vested interest in preserving the dominance of the school system in our society. But the view from where I am is that they’ll only be delaying the inevitable. Perhaps a growth area of employment in years to come will be ex-teachers becoming tutors to home-schooled children! Thanks again.

Bob Collier
Editor, Parental Intelligence, ACT


Confronting ideas about abortion
I was disappointed to read in the June edition of byronchild such a simplistic and emotive approach to the very complex issue of abortion. The perspective of this article appeared to be based on Anglo, middle-class values which highlighted what I am certain is a minority of women who have abortions to advance their spiritual evolution.

The article coined in highly charged spiritual language took a one-dimensional approach to abortion reframing an age-old moral argument. The reality is that abortion is first and foremost a health and human rights issue. We live in a country where many of us afford the luxury of applying morality as the primary discourse around issues such as abortion whereas for others it is about basic survival and making it through another day. I am talking here about women who are victims of domestic violence and are regularly forced against their will to have sexual intercourse with their partners, or the one in four women who are sexually abused by the time they are 18 and who live with that trauma in some cases their entire life; or the 500,000 women world-wide, many living in countries of poverty and violence, who die at the hands of illicit abortion professionals.

I have worked at the coal-face with women making decisions around unintended pregnancy. Some of these women have a personal belief that the foetus does not constitute a life and are unable to make the connection between embryonic cellular form and an actual baby. It so happens that most if not all, legal definitions of a foetus world-wide are of the same opinion.

Some women hold a spiritual belief that the soul of their unborn child will make its way into this life under better circumstances if it is meant to do so. Some consider death to be a part of life and not necessarily in counter-position to it. Others deeply believe their mental health and wellbeing would be irredeemably compromised by having a child and make a responsible decision to honour their own life and discontinue with their pregnancy. Many of these women already have other children whose wellbeing they are also not willing to compromise.

Before 1971 (safely sanctioned abortions) abortion was the highest cause of maternal deaths in Australia, demonstrating that women are willing to risk their lives having an unsafe abortion than having a child they cannot cope with. Regardless of the reasons behind abortion it is no one’s place to take away or deny a woman’s right to act as her own best authority, on issues that deeply and directly affect the most intimate part of her being and life. Many human rights violations have occurred under policies and social pressure (including stigma and guilt) to control women’s reproductive choices. Those jumping on the same bandwagon should tread cautiously.

In an ideal world conscious conception is a worthy principle to live by. The reality is no contraception is fool proof (40% of unintended pregnancy is due to failed contraception), in some countries women do not have access to contraception at all; women are forced to have sex against their will; sexuality education promoting healthy sexual decision-making amongst young people, and health services which are youth friendly are the exception rather than the norm worldwide.

In an ideal world, one which among others facilitates our relationship with creative energy (a homo divinitis world) we would execute empathy and compassion. We would not be so presumptuous as to think that if something is true for me then it has to be true for everyone else. We would respect people’s differences, especially those, which above all are deeply held personal and private beliefs stemming from a kaleidoscope of influences, experiences and life circumstances. Most of which we can never begin to truly understand.

Michelle Wallace
Sexual and Reproductive Health Educator
Queensland


Aware baby and nappies
Thank you so much for your magazine. Through the article ‘Crying and Emotional Release in Babies — the Aware Baby Approach’ (Sept 03), I have solved my daughter’s sleeping problems. She is nine months and now sleeping through the night, while before she was waking two to three times during the night.

I have also started to use cloth nappies. It is not that bad! I don’t feel guilty anymore like I used to, for polluting the environment.

I’ve recommended your magazine to my friends and family. Thank you for the wonderful job you and all your staff are doing.

Rose Panzarino
Queensland


A sincere request
I am writing in the hope you might publish this letter and help me with a personal goal in my life.

I am a bachelor from southern inland NSW who uses a wheelchair due to a birth defect. Because of my disability, I shall never father children. It is my hope to locate someone who is open hearted enough to allow me to share in the powerful experience of witnessing the birth of a child. Even though I shall never be a father, I believe the experience would be emotionally meaningful, a life experience that I will never otherwise have.

I have worked in the area of advocacy for families of children with disabilities and have diploma level childcare qualifications. I am willing to provide interested parties with a full Curriculum Vitae and references as well as details of a NSW Police ‘Working with Children Check’.

I make my search after fully scrutinising my desire and do so confident in the absence of any voyeuristic or ‘sleazy’ motives as I simply wish to say that I have had a complete life experience.

I do not ask for anything foolish such as ongoing contact if it is not desired by the parents and do not initially intend to offer myself as any type of ‘support person’ but merely as a sober and quiet witness to events. To this end I am fully ready to enter into any signed waiver or agreement desired of me.

In addition to this I am fully willing to attend any pre-natal classes or other meetings as proof of my sincerity to carry through with the idea. Additionally, in a home-birth situation, I am most happy to make myself useful in any capacity I would be able.

Should any reader be interested in discussions with me, I can be reached at the address below. Those people ringing me, feel free to reverse charges.

I am happy to travel interstate if needed. Some financial generosity on my part is possible as a way of saying ‘thanks’  if it is required, as is my gratitude and friendship, if wanted.

Mark De Luca
1/52 Eldershaw Dr.
Forest Hill, NSW 2651


Love Notes
A copy of your magazine arrived on the desk today.  I am very impressed with the content and layout of the magazine.
I particularly appreciate your articles ‘I used to have a life: Life as a stepdad’ by Marcus Frank; ‘Breaking out of the Box’ by Trudi Hart, and ‘Myths and Misperceptions about Bullying’ from Dr Tim Field’s website.

These are important issues and we can all benefit from sharing such information and insight. 

Congratulations on such worthy, intelligent, journalism.

Norma Williams
Children’s Services Resource & Advisory Program ACT


Spirit of Learning Conference
It has been wonderful watching byronchild grow. I attended the Community Day of the Soul in Education Conference at Lake Ainsworth. I unfortunately was unable to attend the conference. If possible I’d love to hear more about it through articles in byronchild or from your experiences as a participant. I have recently returned to teaching as a tutor in one of the local secondary schools and would thus appreciate any information that will assist our young people of today. Thanks so much, keep up the good work.

Praba Manning
New South Wales